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Confidence • Discipline • Character • Capability
WELCOME TO RBJJ
A MESSAGE TO OUR PARENTS
When you trust us to teach your child Jiu-Jitsu, you're trusting us with much more than teaching them techniques.
You're trusting us with your child.
We don't take that responsibility lightly.
Our goal is to create an environment where children can become more confident, disciplined, resilient and capable while learning how to safely navigate physical challenges.
Of course, they'll learn Jiu-Jitsu. But they'll also learn how to listen, stay composed when something is difficult, win without arrogance, lose without falling apart, protect themselves without becoming aggressive, work with different personalities, and take responsibility for the people they train with.
We're not simply trying to develop better Jiu-Jitsu students.
We're trying to help develop better young people.
This guide explains what you can expect from us, what we expect from our students, and how we can work together to help your child get the most from their time at RBJJ.
EXPECTATION 01
TRAINING PARTNERS, NOT ENEMIES
One of the first things we want our students to understand is that the person standing across from them in class is not their enemy.
They are their training partner.
Jiu-Jitsu requires two people to learn. Your child will have moments when they succeed and moments when their partner succeeds. Both are necessary.
We emphasize respect, control, cooperation and protecting your training partners. Learning how to challenge someone without intentionally hurting them, and how to be challenged without becoming discouraged, is part of what makes Jiu-Jitsu so valuable.
Protect yourself.
Protect your training partner.
Learn together.
EXPECTATION 02
TAPPING IS COMMUNICATION
One of the first skills every child learns is how and when to tap.
Tapping is not failure. Tapping is communication.
It means, "I've reached my limit. Let's stop, reset and learn from what happened."
We want children to understand that there is nothing embarrassing about tapping. Creating that environment allows them to experiment, problem-solve and challenge themselves without feeling that every difficult position is something they have to win.
Learning when to work through discomfort and when to communicate a boundary is an important skill both on and off the mats.
EXPECTATION 03
HYGIENE IS PART OF RESPECT
Jiu-Jitsu involves close physical contact and shared training surfaces. Cleanliness isn't simply an academy rule. It's part of being a good training partner.
CLEAN TRAINING GEAR
Gis, rash guards and other training clothing should be clean for every class.
FINGERNAILS & TOENAILS
Please keep your child's fingernails and toenails trimmed short and smooth. Long or sharp nails can easily scratch a training partner.
NO JEWELRY ON THE MAT
Earrings, necklaces, bracelets, watches and other jewelry or accessories should be removed before training.
SHOES OFF THE MAT — SHOES ON OFF THE MAT
Students should never walk onto the training mats wearing shoes. They also should not enter bathrooms or other off-mat areas barefoot and then return to the mats.
CUTS & SKIN CONCERNS
Please let an instructor know about open cuts, wounds or unusual skin concerns before class.
WHEN IN DOUBT, STAY HOME
If your child has a fever, contagious illness or suspicious skin condition, please keep them home until it is safe for them to return.
Missing one class is always better than potentially exposing an entire room of teammates.
EXPECTATION 04
JIU-JITSU STAYS ON THE MAT
This is one of the most important conversations we ask parents to reinforce at home.
Learning Jiu-Jitsu does not give a child permission to hit, kick, punch, choke, tackle, wrestle or practice submissions on siblings, friends or classmates.
PLEASE REINFORCE THIS AT HOME.
Jiu-Jitsu techniques belong in the academy under appropriate supervision — not in the living room, on the playground, at school, or while playing with brothers, sisters or friends.
We want children to understand the difference between knowing how to fight and looking for a fight.
If your child is being bullied, threatened or physically harmed, please communicate with us. Those situations deserve thoughtful conversations about awareness, confidence, boundaries, de-escalation and appropriate self-protection.
The more capable they become, the more responsible we expect them to become.
UNDERSTANDING OUR COACHING TEAM
DIFFERENT BELTS. ONE STANDARD.
Throughout your child's time at RBJJ, you'll see instructors and assistant coaches of different ranks helping teach, demonstrate, supervise and work directly with our students.
This is intentional.
Our Kids Program operates under the curriculum, philosophy and standards established by our black belt leadership. The implementation of that curriculum is shared with carefully selected instructors and assistant coaches who are trusted to work within those standards.
TEACHING IS A SKILL OF ITS OWN.
Knowing Jiu-Jitsu and knowing how to teach Jiu-Jitsu — especially to children — are different skills.
Teaching kids requires patience, communication, awareness, encouragement, and the ability to recognize that two children may need completely different approaches to understand the exact same lesson.
We don't simply put someone in front of a children's class because of the belt around their waist. We select the people we trust to work with our kids based on their knowledge, temperament, patience, communication and ability to connect with young students.
A good blue belt has already spent significant time learning the fundamentals of Jiu-Jitsu. They've experienced the difficult beginning stages themselves — learning how to survive, escape, move properly, remain composed and understand foundational positions.
A purple belt has progressed considerably further, developing deeper positional understanding, connecting techniques and learning how to solve problems as they happen.
That experience can make them extremely valuable teachers and mentors for a child learning those same lessons for the first time.
Think about a great school.
The principal carries responsibility for the educational standard, but the principal doesn't personally teach every lesson to every child.
The curriculum and expectations come from experienced leadership. Trusted teachers provide the attention, repetition and individual guidance that allow students to develop.
Jiu-Jitsu is similar. Sometimes what a child needs most isn't the most advanced technique available in the room. They need someone who notices exactly where they're struggling, slows the lesson down, and helps one fundamental detail finally make sense.
THE CURRICULUM COMES FROM EXPERIENCE.
THE STANDARD COMES FROM LEADERSHIP.
THE DEVELOPMENT HAPPENS THROUGH ATTENTION.
Especially with children, great coaching isn't only about how much Jiu-Jitsu you know. It's about how well you can help the child in front of you learn it.
EXPECTATION 05
EVERY CHILD LEARNS DIFFERENTLY
Children don't develop on identical timelines.
One child may understand a technique immediately but struggle emotionally when things become difficult. Another may need to see something ten times before it clicks — but once it does, they may never forget it.
Some children are naturally assertive. Others need time before they become comfortable engaging physically. Some listen easily but hesitate to act. Others learn by moving, experimenting and making mistakes.
None of those differences automatically mean a child is ahead or behind.
Our responsibility as coaches is to recognize those differences and adapt wherever possible.
Your role as a parent is equally important:
BE PATIENT WITH THE PROCESS.
It can be tempting to compare your child to another student or develop expectations about how quickly they should learn, compete, earn a stripe or become more confident.
We're interested in developing the child standing in front of us — not comparing them to the child standing next to them.
EXPECTATION 06
DISCOMFORT IS PART OF THE PROCESS
Jiu-Jitsu will sometimes put your child in genuinely uncomfortable situations.
They may be underneath someone bigger. They may struggle to escape. They may forget a technique they knew yesterday. They may lose a round. They may become frustrated. They may even have days when they tell you they don't want to come back.
Those moments deserve attention, but they don't automatically mean something is wrong.
Sometimes those are the moments when some of the most important development is happening.
Can they listen while frustrated?
Can they control their emotions?
Can they receive coaching when their first instinct is to give up?
Can they try again after something doesn't work?
Can they remain respectful when someone gets the better of them?
Those skills can't be developed without occasionally experiencing difficulty.
Resilience isn't built by removing every uncomfortable moment. It's built by learning how to move through those moments with the right support.
That doesn't mean ignoring genuine concerns. If something feels wrong, talk to us. Parents and coaches should always communicate.
But whenever possible, give your child the opportunity to work through appropriate challenges before immediately removing the challenge for them. You may be surprised by what they become capable of.
PART OF THE JOURNEY
SOMETIMES THE HAMMER.
SOMETIMES THE NAIL.
There will be days when everything works. Your child executes the technique, escapes the position, gets the submission, or walks off the mat feeling unstoppable.
There will also be days when very little works.
That's Jiu-Jitsu.
Sometimes they're the hammer.
Sometimes they're the nail.
But they're always building something.
The victories build confidence.
The difficult days build humility, patience, adaptability and resilience.
Both matter.
EXPECTATION 07
DON'T CHASE BELTS & STRIPES
Children will notice belts. Parents will too.
It's natural to wonder when the next stripe or promotion is coming. But two children who begin training on the same day won't necessarily progress at the same rate.
Technical development matters, but so do consistency, effort, focus, maturity, control, behavior, resilience, receptiveness to coaching, and how a student treats their teammates.
A promotion should mean something.
Don't teach your child to chase the belt.
Teach them to become the person who earns it.
Celebrate progress, not just promotions.
EXPECTATION 08
LET THE COACHES COACH
Parents are one of the most important parts of a successful Kids Program.
Getting your child to class consistently, encouraging them, reinforcing respect, and showing interest in what they're learning can have an enormous impact.
One of the most valuable things you can also give them is room to learn.
During class, allow the coaches to coach. Multiple voices giving a child instructions can create confusion and unnecessary pressure.
Your child needs the opportunity to listen to their instructor, make decisions, make mistakes and solve problems without constantly looking toward the sideline for answers or approval.
Listen.
Keep trying.
Be respectful.
Be a good training partner.
Have fun.
Don't give up.
If you see something that concerns you, please talk to us. Parents and coaches should never feel like opposing sides. We're on the same team.
EXPECTATION 09
THE RIDE HOME MATTERS
What happens after class can shape how your child interprets what happened during class.
Instead of immediately asking:
"Did you win?"
"Did you tap anyone?"
"Why did that kid get you?"
"When are you getting your next stripe?"
Try asking:
"What did you learn today?"
"What was difficult?"
"What was fun?"
"Did you help anyone today?"
"What are you excited to try again?"
Those questions teach children that success is bigger than winning a round.
Sometimes the best answer they can give you is, "I kept trying." That matters.
EXPECTATION 10
TELL US WHAT WE NEED TO KNOW
Every child walks through our doors carrying more than a gym bag.
Sometimes they're having a difficult week at school. Sometimes something has changed at home. Sometimes they're anxious, overwhelmed, frustrated or simply having a bad day.
We don't need to know every detail of your family's life.
But if there's something that may help us better understand or support your child, please communicate with us.
The better we understand the child standing in front of us, the better we're able to coach them.
THE LONG GAME
CONSISTENCY CHANGES KIDS
Progress in Jiu-Jitsu rarely happens in a straight line.
There will be breakthroughs and plateaus. Excitement and frustration. Great classes and difficult ones.
Your child may occasionally question themselves. That's one reason consistency matters.
We've seen it countless times: children who initially struggled to focus, participate, communicate, handle adversity, or simply step onto the mat can become almost unrecognizable over time.
Not because somebody forced them to change overnight.
Because they kept showing up.
They accumulated experiences. They learned skills. They developed relationships. They overcame small challenges, then bigger ones.
Eventually, those experiences begin changing the way they see themselves.
OUR PARTNERSHIP WITH YOU
WE MAY SEE A DIFFERENT SIDE OF YOUR CHILD
Parents and coaches see children through different lenses.
You know your child in ways we never will.
At the same time, Jiu-Jitsu gives us an opportunity to see your child navigating challenge, pressure, teamwork, success and failure in ways that may not always appear at home.
Sometimes we'll see confidence beginning to emerge before they recognize it themselves.
Sometimes we'll see frustration that needs patience rather than rescue.
Sometimes we'll see leadership developing in a child who never considered themselves a leader.
Sometimes we'll recognize that today isn't the day to push harder.
And sometimes we'll simply see a child who needs someone to tell them, "You're doing fine. Keep going."
THE BIGGER PICTURE
WE'RE PLAYING THE LONG GAME
Jiu-Jitsu gives children something increasingly rare: a safe place to experience real challenges.
They will succeed. They will struggle. They will be uncomfortable. They will laugh. They will become frustrated. They will solve problems.
They will learn how to control another person — and, perhaps more importantly, how to control themselves.
There will be days when they surprise you. There may also be days when you wonder whether they're progressing at all.
Be patient.
Trust the process.
Communicate with us.
And give them time.
Because the child who walks through our doors today may be very different from the one who walks out years from now.
LET THEM LEARN.
LET THEM STRUGGLE.
LET THEM GROW.
BE THERE WHEN THEY NEED YOU.
Our goal isn't simply to see how good at Jiu-Jitsu your child can become.
It's to see who they can become through Jiu-Jitsu.
Thank you for trusting us to be part of that journey.
WELCOME TO THE RBJJ FAMILY.
Professor Radji Barrett
3rd Degree Black Belt
Radji Barrett Jiu-Jitsu
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Radji Barrett Jiu Jitsu
